Hang Up your Hang Ups

10 Sep
You can tell I felt a little awkward…

 When I look back at pictures of myself, my mouth was never open. I felt ugly and ashamed. I was always afraid someone would look at me and say, “What’s up with her teeth?”

I’m a woman and have suffered my share of hang ups. Especially in the fitness profession, I’ve heard every version of self-depreciation…

What can I do to fix this?” A woman asked as she grabbed her stomach.

What can I do to get rid of my bat wings?” As she points to the extra skin on her underarm and proceeds to jiggle it.

What can I do to get of my thunder thighs?” She slaps her hips.

I never look at myself in the mirror” A lady told me as she proceeded to turn her eyes towards the floor.

“I don’t have pictures of myself in the house. It’s too embarassing.”

I have too much cellulite, how do I get rid of it?

This list can go on and on. I think back to myself and my teeth. As crooked and yellow as they may be, they are part of me. I shouldn’t be embarassed about it. We all have our hang ups. If it helps I have jiggly bits around my stomach, arms and legs. Cellulite too! I’ve exercised since I was thirteen years old. I’ve never had kids. I have stretch marks too.

My questions is this… what the hell have we got to be ashamed of? Where is the rule that says we have to be perfect? It’s all a state of mind. If you keep looking for reasons why you’re so “ugly” you’re going to find them. If you look for reasons why you’re “amazing” you’ll find those too. We all have parts of our body that we want to fix. The point here is not physical appearance.

Our lives can be amazing no matter what shape we happen to be.

Happiness takes on all shapes and sizes.

The point it this: If you don’t love yourself then any physical change you make will ever be enough. You are enough. You are enough to love and respect. You are enough to be worthy of any life you want. My teeth haven’t changed a heck of a lot. No matter how imperfect you may feel…

DON’T BE AFRAID TO SMILE!

True Love Starts with You

05 Apr

We grow up thinking that when we fall in love and meet that special someone, that’s where “true love” begins. What a fantasy! As little girls we watch Disney movies where the Princess falls in love with her Prince Charming and it’s happily ever after…. I can tell you it’s all a crock!
There are those of us that are searching desperately for that other half of us to make our lives complete. We are looking for external things to make our lives complete. I can tell you from experience that no person, no amount of money or beauty will ever make our lives complete.
True love starts with you. Being a woman I understand when we grow up and how we’re taught that fantasy of meeting a man (prince charming) and he makes our life a fairy tale. Well, I guess I missed that part of childhood. I was always taught that I should never rely nor expect someone to come along and make me happy. It was up to me to be happy. It was up to me to love myself. My life wouldn’t become complete when I met the “other half”. My life would always be complete and when I met someone then I could offer them my whole heart.
The trouble with the “true love” idea is that we’re taught that it comes from someone else. We have to wait all our lives to find it. We have to search our lives to find it. I’m a simple kind of person. I believe that everything we need in life is usually right in front of us. I believe that the “true love” we seek to find is right here. It always has been and always will be.

I promised that I wouldn’t spend my life disliking myself because of so-called imperfections. I’ve seen too many women and young girls beat themselves up for things they cannot change. They’ve asked me “How do I change this?” “How do I get rid of this?” “How do I lose weight?” I decided something a long time ago… I’m going to take control of things that I CAN control. The rest is up to fate. I cannot change the cellulite on my hips nor the scars on my legs. I’m not going to spend my life chasing some version of myself that’s already pretty awesome. You must keep in mind one thing. Stop looking for “true love”.  Stop looking for someone or something to “complete you”. The only person capable of doing that is YOU. The key to finding true love is learning to love yourself first. I think the sooner you come to this conclusion, the happier you can be. We are so hell bent on finding it. We are so sad when we don’t. We are taught that it’s given to us by another. It’s all nonsense. Our society has put ideas in to our head that as women, our life is not complete until we “have it all”. What does that even mean?

What kind of lies are they feeding us?
Ladies, those of you out there who have spent your life in misery because you can’t find it… the power is ALWAYS yours. I want to encourage you to have a good look in the mirror. The key to your happiness is that person staring back at you. I believe that when you really and truly learn to give yourself love, you can offer it to others.

My advice for today: Stop searching. Stop trying. Stop being miserable. Start with you. The person who is aching the most for true love is you. Why not be the first to give yourself what you’re looking for? Let’s face it… no one else can. True love will ALWAYS start with you. Start loving yourself today 🙂 You deserve it.